Parenting in Gospel Context: Practices Do Make a Difference (Chapter 11)

In this blog, I will also be discussing three important aspects of chapter 11 in the text, Successful Marriages and Families that emphasize the importance of "Parenting in Gospel Context". The first important aspect of the chapter is that "As children grow through the years, their lives, in large measure, become an extension and a reflection of family teaching. If there is harshness, abuse, uncontrolled anger, disloyalty, the fruits will be certain and discernable, and in all likelihood they will be repeated in the generation that follows. If on the other hand, there is forbearance, forgiveness, respect, consideration, kindness, mercy, and compassion, the fruits again will be discernible, and they will be eternally rewarding. They will be positive and sweet and wonderful.... I speak to fathers and mothers everywhere with a plea to put harshness behind us, to bridle our anger, to lower our voices, and to deal with mercy and love and respect one toward another in our homes." (President Hinckley, 1990, P. 70, as cited in Nelson). I thought that this was an important aspect because how parents treat their children will affect how they perceive themselves. Another important aspect is that "the primary goal of any socialization should be to promote children's internalization of the reasons for behaving appropriately rather than to behave solely to avoid punishment... The research to date indicates that physical punishment does not promote long-term, internalized compliance." (Nelson, 2012, P. 122). The last important aspect of the chapter is that "Additional insights regarding the importance of parenting are evident in the domain of parenting intervention, where studies consistently show that positive changes in parenting lead to more appropriate child changes in parenting lead to more appropriate child behaviors beyond the family environment." (Nelson, 2012, P. 120).

Elder David A. Bednar stated that "As parents are patient and persistent in loving their children and in becoming living examples of disciples of Jesus Christ, they most effectively teach the Father’s plan of happiness. The steadfastness of such parents bears powerful witness of the redeeming and strengthening powers of the Savior’s Atonement and invites wayward children to see with new eyes and to hear with new ears."

Elder Robert D. Hales stated that "Besides showing youth the way by example, we lead them by understanding their hearts and walking alongside them on the gospel path. To truly understand their hearts, we must do more than just be in the same room or attend the same family and Church activities. We must plan and take advantage of teaching moments that make a deep and lasting impression upon their minds and hearts."

References:

• Nelson, D. A. (2012). Parenting in Gospel context: Practices Do Make a Difference. In Successful marriages and families: Proclamation principles and research perspectives (pp. 120-122). Provo, Utah: Brigham Young University.
• Bednar, D. A. (2014, March). Faithful Parents and Wayward Children: Sustaining Hope While Overcoming Misunderstanding - Ensign Mar. 2014 - ensign. Retrieved July 19, 2014, from https://www.lds.org/ensign/2014/03/faithful-parents-and-wayward-children-sustaining-hope-while-overcoming-misunderstanding?lang=eng
• Hales, R. D. (2010, April). Our Duty to God: The Mission of Parents and Leaders to the Rising Generation - general-conference. Retrieved July 19, 2014, from https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2010/04/our-duty-to-god-the-mission-of-parents-and-leaders-to-the-rising-generation?lang=eng